My Ass

I went out side with Rex to let him do his business.
"Come one Rex, do your duty."
He just looks at me as if to say. Chill dude, all in good time.
A few minutes of watching my dog  walk in a circle sniffing the ground and I being to get impatient.
"Rex dude come on, just go already."
The tiny chihuahua glares at me.
I sigh.
I look up to see the most perfect vision of hourglass beauty that I have ever seen walking towards me, and suddenly realize that while I would like to talk to her, I'm holding a doggy doo-doo bag.
"Oh god, wait til she walks bye. Please Rex please wait til shes gone past us." I whisper to my dog pleadingly.
She's now two feet in front of me, and I smile my most charming, roguish smile. and honestly who can resist a man who has a little dog.
"You know what they say about men with little dogs. They're more secure."
At least that's what I'm told, by my female friends.
She smiles back and right then I hear Rex grunting.
Oh God no...
I look down and see my little canine grunting, and super flexing his was through the deed.
When I look back up the woman is walking away, laughing.
"Nice work Rex. Man's best friend my ass."